You have a drowning cheating feeling inside your stomach, that something just ain’t right but you can’t figure out what that feeling is about. Your spouse has become distant, he/she now works late on a regular basis or, maybe your spouse has moved out of the house with no explanation.
You suspect your spouse is cheating on you, but every time you bring it up, he/she denies the possibility. All the signs are out there but you just don’t have any proof. So, look out for signs and your instinct but make sure you don’t confuse signs with proof.
The List Of The Cheating Signs
1. “I love you but I’m not in love with you.”
Worry when you start hearing such words, when you hear them, a big warning bell should immediately go off. This is one of the most consistent thing a cheating spouse is likely to say. Your spouse may have a deep, loving bond with you but, intense feelings of passion can override the bond with you and cause your spouse to lose sight of his/her true feelings.
The cheating spouse will develop what I call hormone-induced amnesia. The surging hormones and passion they feel in their new relationship can cause some very skewed thinking.
I think this is one of the causes of relationship infidelity in many relations. The spouse who strays has spent years investing time, emotion and energy in the marriage. They may feel that no matter what they do, they cannot or, are not getting what they feel they need from the relationship.
They lack skills to do something different, something that may work in their favor to get them what they need from the relationship. They get stuck in negativity.
People who got stucked find it difficult to get out of it, they see their problems as permanent and many times think the only way to get unstuck is to turn to someone else. A new relationship is a great way to distract themselves from the problems in a marriage.
Then comes the sudden untrue enjoyment, lust and passion that comes with a new found relationship. All of a sudden, they are getting everything they need from another man or woman. After years of not getting their needs met in the marriage, this can be a huge relief.
If you are reading this article right now and you are someone who has found relief in a relationship with someone outside your marriage, I have something I would like you to do.
Before walking out of your marriage and family by leaving for another person, I want you to think about indept feeling, if it’s true or just a distraction. Don’t use the new relationship as a distraction to keep you from being honest with yourself and your spouse. If you are a cheating spouse make sure that one of the problems below is not causing you to throw your marriage away just to keep it from having to deal with them open mind and honesty.
It is very important for both spouses to try to see things from each others perspectives and to always accomodate each others opinion. For nobody is an outstanding or mistake free wife or husband. You guys may have different varying opinions, the right thing to do is to give each other a fare hearing and gently reconcile any differences as there are no problem free relationship.
2. “We are just friends.”
This word breaks heart sometimes, I call it the mighty hammer of Thor, it another predictable statement that will come from a cheating spouse. If your spouse is spending more and more time with his/her new “friend”; then there is probably more to it than mere friendship.
Along the way your spouse may feel they have a lot in common with the newly met person, that this newly met person understands them and the things they are going through.
3. A sudden need for privacy.
If what you guys normally shared openly starts becoming private, then there is every probability that something is wrong. He/she may start password protecting computer activity. Cell phone and credit card bills may be hidden.
If you start asking questtions about things you guys normally shared together, you will be accused of snooping or trying to control your spouse. It’s a Big warning sign!
4. “I need some space to figure out my feelings.”
It’s most likely that when men or women start requesting for more than usual space and time from their spouse, they may be involved or seeing someone else. They may contend that it is due to confusion over their feelings or stress at work.
This can be a sign that there is someone else and the spouse is trying to figure out ways to have more freedom.
5. Regular work habits change.
Working late is a good cover-up for a spouse who is having an outside affair. If your spouse suddenly has to work late after years of coming home at a certain time then I would say it is safe to be suspicious that something other than work is going on.outside affairs become excellent liars. People who ain’t frequent liars become experts. Trust your gut instinct but get hard, cold proof also.